It's My Job

It has been one week since I “officially” started my new job. Correction : my new job function. I am still employed at the same company, but instead of being in Portfolio Management, I am in Business Control. And from conversations I’ve had with many of you, I know you are not quite certain what I do at work. So, here is a (hopefully) understandable explanation of the departments (as they relate to my particular job / business unit / company).

Portfolio Management (Valuation & Risk Management)
--optimize the value of the supply chain and assets (portfolio) by monitoring the business portfolio and commercial environment
--increase financial margin while reducing costs and risks
--ensure that commodity and foreign exchange risks are measured and managed in a portfolio context
--provide deal and project valuation services in a portfolio context
--ensure Portfolio’s models, tools, and processes evolve as needed
--provide annual budget forecasts for the supply chain (operational business), monthly updates, and explanations of variances in budgeted figures versus actual results

Business Control (Finance, Accounting and Risk Control teams)
Finance & Accounting
--management control (budget, medium term plan)
--performance monitoring (results and cash flow)
--financial and fiscal monitoring of commitments (acquisitions, disposals, reorganisations, investments, guarantees)

Risk control
--validate transactions to ensure economic & market risks are captured accurately and are in compliance with Risk Policy
--monitor and perform control actions on the commodity and currency risks ; report exceptions and troubleshoot and repair immediately
--document all financial deals and prepare reports as required by IAS and IFRS
--follow internal control procedures to ensure proper documentation and information accuracy on transaction modelling, trade capture and deal maintenance. Create, modify, and standardise controls (processes & procedures) as needed
--audit and control inputs into and calculation methodologies within the business unit


Ok, maybe that’s not so clear? Or, it is clear from a conceptual view, but I don’t think it’s clear what I’m giving up and what I’m taking on. Basically, I no longer do the calculation of the hedge requirements or deal transactions. Instead, I validate the calculations once they are done to make sure accurate & consistent assumptions were used, that a calculation was actually done, and that the deal does not add risk to the group. I’ve basically moved from the “Front Office” to the “Middle Office”. Not really a “creator” but a “monitorer”. And, I know, that doesn’t sound interesting ; and, it sounds more bureaucratic. But, it is a much better fit for me. When I first started in Portfolio with the company 6 years ago, it was a great fit. Now, it’s more technical and high-strung than I prefer.


Also, I put “officially” in quotes because I technically made the change effective July 1, but due to my being on holiday, and other co-workers (including my new boss) being on holiday, I was still doing my old job functions until last week. Well, I’m still doing some, to be honest. And, well, ok, the major reason I am now in my new job function is because I finally changed desks.

And what does changing desks entail ...

It seems it means you ask your assistant to make the request to ‘the people’ in the building and your request sits there a week or two or three and finally you get so fed up you bring in your own screwdriver to remove the “security” lock on your laptop, and you move yourself.

I used to have a ‘room with a view’ – a gorgeous view of Paris/Montmartre, the clouds, sun, etc. Now, I have a hotel. My new area is much quieter, but also darker. The lights are on a sensor, so they often go out. And you can sit in your chair and wave your arms like a goof, but that doesn’t activate the lights. In my old space that was fine because there was all sunlight. I’m not even thinking about how dark it’ll be when winter comes.

I was sitting in an area that was much noisier / active (stands to reason as it operations & trading) and in closest proximity to 3 French men & a Belgian. So it was 90% French all the time, and I found that as every day passed, I was less a part of the group than the day before. (Sure, I didn’t make much effort to stop that from happening ; I think such effort would’ve been futile.) But, I didn’t mind their talking – conversations were business focused, to the point, and short.

Now, I’m in a super quiet part of the floor, in one of the corners, so people don’t really walk by. It’ll be quiet, which I like, but then when people do talk it seems intrusive rather than a part of business. The two women behind me seem to like to talk, and they think they’re being helpful by whispering, but it makes it worse! Instead of blocking out regular talking, all I hear is the high pitch frequency that accompanies a whisper. Nails on a chalkboard. I’m hoping that when the other 2 people in the desk area return from holiday next week that the whispering will stop.

The other point of contention will be the air conditioning. The two women don’t like it because it makes noise. But when we turn it off (each area of 4-8 desks has a remote to control the a/c, lights, window blinds), it gets warm and stuffy. However, most French seem to be cold all the time (e.g. when temperatures dropped from upper 80s into upper 60s two weeks ago, scarves, sweaters, turtlenecks, etc. were making appearances).

This should be interesting. But, I’d better learn to adapt as this is my space for 28 more months!

My new space

Random thoughts

Some random thoughts I've been compiling the past two weeks (my apologies if any are repeats) :

--If it is Monday and I say "next weekend I am going to Boston", what do you think? Do you think 5 days from now or 14? In France/French, they think 5 days (i.e. le week-end prochain), as in this weekend. It was confusing enough when we expats got to the Paris office, so we overcompensated by always using dates. But now, we're getting ourselves confused with using "next" - is it this or next, or next next?

--One colleague gets Le Monde every day at work. But it is in his corporate mailbox by 3 p.m for the next day - how can they write, edit, layout, print, publish and distribute the next day's paper by 3 p.m. the preceding day?

--I am always amazed by people who go on holiday and then return all gung-ho, ready to work 12 hour days and are excited about work. Sure, I return from vacation all rejuvenated, but not necessarily raring to be back at work.

--I keep trying to figure out what to do with my life when this stint is up. I thought, gee where would my current zip code put me in the US? Turns out, Denton Texas. Time to think up a new moving location strategy.

--Yes, it seems to be a universal problem....filling the copy machine with paper. I feel like I am forever putting paper into it, nevermind that I print 1% the amount that the guys down the hall print. I just went in to pick up a print job and one guy was staring at the display screen, then left. Ummm, 2 of the 3 paper try indicators were Red, showing 0 paper. And the dude just walked away. I'm going to go mental one of these days very soon.

--If you’re supposed to use hot water to wash your hands, how come most of the faucets in the women’s room are turned to cold?

--And speaking of hygiene ... the company has had all these meetings and studies relating to H1N1 and whether or not we can all work from home. But still the French insist on shaking hands every morning (or, if it is 3 p.m. and it's the first time they've seen you, then shake hands then) ; granted, it's better than the kissing. But seriously - GERMS. I know not everyone washes hands. So now, before the person even turns away I take out my hand sanitizer and use it in front of them, with a slight look of disgust on my face. One day I want to sneeze into my hand and then shake theirs. And never mind the interruption it brings to your work/concentration, to stop what you're doing to shake hands ; or that the other person will stand there in the hallway and wait with hand outstretched while you shift your papers, phone, pens from right hand to left.

--One of my neurosis is I like blue ink pens... Another one is that even if it’s a cheap, free, pen, I.want.it.back. So how did I ‘lose’ 2 pens and 1 pencil last week? I am sure when colleagues were at my desk and we were doing work, they walked off with them. And I think I know who, but how can I go take back a cheap, free, office pen? The kicker is the pens were from the London office and I like them. A lot. Ugh.

--The UK has a “Serious Fraud Office”? Seriously? That's the name, honest.

--When I read books where characters are in relationships, experience emotions, etc (i.e. all books), it makes me realise I have little of that, of close human emotion/contact and makes me feel more alone. I feel better when I read things like National Geographic (well, then I just hate humanity and weep for Mother Earth rather than myself).

--Yes, I actually feel like it is a minor victory, like I have done something to advance time when I am looking at the clock on my computer and it changes. Seriously. It was 13:52 and then it was 13:53 - all because I looked! Whew.

It's My Job

Today was my first day in the office. I felt like a first grader getting ready for school - had my clothes picked out, made my lunch, walked with a friend (Gwen) to the bus stop, etc.

The office, however, is freakishly quiet. I mean, the only sounds you hear are keyboards and the air conditioner. Even when people are on the phone they're nearly mute. I swear, you could almost hear someone chewing their food if you tried. It'll probably be the best diet ever for me - paranoia. I mean, today I go to one of the water coolers that is in the middle of the office area and even the gulping sound that it makes as the water empties out sounded like it was played over a loud speaker. I kept looking around and no one seemed to notice, or maybe they're used to it?

Also, the floor plan of the office is nearly 100% cubicles with only about eight offices. And, the cubicles have low partitions - about waist / rib cage high depending how tall you are. You can see everybody's computer screens from your desk and see what everybody is doing. Very bizarre. I'll probably develop a slight nervous twitch thinking someone is behind me.

Things went smoothly overall - a nice first day. Productive, but not overly hectic.

Now, I probably should get started on some other minor things. You know, like finding an apartment, opening a bank account, actually seeing something British besides a double-decker red bus and ridiculously high prices...